total sian-ness.

i can't take this way of life anymore.

i can't seem to focus on anything now.

there's so much coming onto me so quickly. everything's building up so quickly. there's so much to be done, so much to be said, so much to be learnt, and so very very very little time left.

there's so much i'm neglecting. i'll tell you the whole absolute truth, i miss my music. i really miss it.

why do i keep screwing up everything? why is it that when i put in effort for something, i can only stand at one side and watch it all fall down?

and when i choose to stay at one side for fear of destroying it, i get scolded for not caring. do you really think i don't care? do you really think i can't be bothered? do you think that i don't take pride in this? what sort of a person do you think i am? you think i care more about my lunch than about this? i don't understand you, okay, that's done. but now, i know perfectly well, that it's far better me not understanding you. cos if i do, i know that things will only get uglier.

i'm trying. really trying not to be too hard on myself. really trying not to hate the person God created. it's not as easy. i'm trying, i'm really really trying.

...

i'm tired. really tired.

dear Lord, please make me rest.

...

hang in there girl! after these two months, everything will be okay again! then you can happily enjoy your holidays!

...

all that mugging during the school hols was quite cool. i could answer history questions without a textbook ^^

haiz... no more rats to cook for me T_T

R.I.P little rats... :(

poor little thing. thank goodness 老师 is a kind person and decided to set the little rat free.

having minced meat in your nose isn't very nice. it's really gross, actually.

extracting the DNA of a kiwi fruit is so fun.

acting can be really tiring. but i think i'm born to act. cos i do it rather well

thanks Debbie, for lending me your devo book. the September 3 entry was a totally random flip. so cool ^^

...

so odd. i want to be myself, and yet i seriously hate myself. contradictions.

whoo.

Oliver James - The Ride Of Your Life

Wishing on a shooting star
But dreams alone won't get you far
Can't deny your feelings anymore
The world is waiting right outside your door
What are you waiting for

Come on here's your chance
Dont let it slip right through your hands
Are you ready for the ride of your life
Your dreams arrive on the wind
Just reach out and pull them in
Get ready for the ride of your life
The ride of your life

In your heart you know what you must do
You only got yourself to answer to
Don't let fear of falling hold you down
Your spirit's flying high above the clouds
You go right there

Come on here's your chance
Dont let it slip right through your hands
Are you ready for the ride of your life
Your dreams arive on the wind
Just reach out and pull them in
Get ready for the ride of your life

Your on your way no looking back
And there's no future living in the past
Your free at last
Yeah yeah yeah
Your free at last

Come on here's your chance
Dont let it slip right through your hands
Are you ready for the ride of your life
Your dreams arive on the wind
Just reach out and pull them in
Get ready for the ride of your life
The ride of your life

Come on come on
Get ready
Yeah yeah yeah

Your dreams arrvie on the wind
Just reach out and pull them in
Get ready for the ride of your life

later, toony