it seemed like a perfect day.

i woke up punctually, did my devos (which ensures that i won't fall asleep halfway through praying), had a REALLY good breakfast which flew all the way from Japan.

i practised on my new clarinet (okay, it's 12, not really that new, but... yeah) and i actually remembered all the exercises.

i had a good lunch, and plenty of slack time.

i baked the best vanilla cupcakes i've ever baked, and even had frosting to go with it, though that didn't turn out well.

i've realised i don't appear to be a terrible person to others, and that i have REALLY funny friends.

but what killed me, was realising that while my day went great, a friend of mine was going through the mental torment i went through in April.
i don't know how to help you. in fact, i can't help you. you have to go through this yourself. i can only provide a shoulder and a warm embrace if you ever need it. be strong, girl.

...

and thank you Lord, for blessing me with this day. for not tempting me beyond what i can handle. and now, please please, help her the way you helped me. she deserves it more than me.

you don't need the answers to all of life's questions. just know that He loves you. hang on.

Casting Crowns - Love Them Like Jesus

The love of her life is drifting away
They’re losing the fight for another day
The life that she’s known is falling apart
A fatherless home, a child’s broken heart

You’re holding her hand, you’re straining for words
You trying to make - sense of it all
She’s desperate for hope, darkness clouding her view
She’s looking to you

Just love her like Jesus, carry her to Him
His yoke is easy, His burden is light
You don’t need the answers to all of life’s questions
Just know that He loves her and stay by her side
Love her like Jesus
Love her like Jesus

The gifts lie in wait, in a room painted blue
Little blessing from Heaven would be there soon
Hope fades in the night, blue skies turn to grey
As the little one slips away

You’re holding their hand, you’re straining for words
You’re trying to make sense of it all
They’re desperate for hope, darkness clouding their view
They’re looking to you

Just love them like Jesus, carry them to Him
His yoke is easy, His burden is light
You don’t need the answers to all of life’s questions
Just know that He loves them and stay by their side
Love them like Jesus

Lord of all creation holds our lives in His hands
The God of all the nations holds our lives in His hands
The Rock of our salvation holds our lives in His hands
He cares for them just as He cares for you

So love them like Jesus, love them like Jesus
You don’t need the answers to all of life’s questions
Just know that He loves them and stay by their side
Love them like Jesus
Love them like Jesus

later, toony